Marshmallow the Bichon Frise: How do I let go of a grudge?

Dear Paws to Talk,

Last year, I had a falling out with one of my friends. Her nice dog disguise came off and I saw her true colors.

We worked together as therapy dogs which is where her ugly side came out. She didn’t take the job seriously and would bark mean things about others to make herself look good. 

One day, I was feeling down because one of my humans had been in the hospital so I confided in her. Little did I know that she would share this information with our supervisor and mention that I may not be fit to work.

I was furious! I cut off all communication with her. I love my job and take it very seriously.

 All this time later, the thought of her makes my fur stand up straight. I want to let go of this anger for my own well-being. How do I do that?

-Marshmallow the Bichon Frise

Howl Marshmallow,

A story like this gets us grumbling mad. We don’t understand why some animals and humans feel the need to act like they are better than others.

Your former friend sounds like she has a lot of issues. Maybe she didn’t get out of her crate much as a puppy? Her nasty behavior is an attempt to compensate for something that is missing in her life.

Understandably, you have some pent-up anger towards this dog. We think you should write her a letter explaining how you feel betrayed, hurt and furious at her actions. Let those paw prints flow on the paper. It is your choice if you want to send it or not. Sometimes just getting your feelings out is relief enough and there is no need to involve the culprit.

The best thing you can do is focus on the supportive beings in your life. You seem to be a compassionate canine and you have a delicious name. Life is too short to hold a grudge. Also, carrying around that baggage can’t be good for your posture.

Get a massage and then walk freely because you dropped that baggage at the local dump.


Bella and DiDi
















© Margot Ahlquist and Paws to Talk, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Margot Ahlquist and Paws to Talk with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

25 thoughts on “Marshmallow the Bichon Frise: How do I let go of a grudge?

  1. Pingback: The Real Protector | Cindy Holman

  2. Hey Marshmallow,

    Glad you decided to seek the wise words from the Girls Bella and DiDi!! You shouldn’t let anything stand or sit in the way of your important work as a Therapy Dog – you should stay focused on the people you are there to make smile!

    I also work as a Therapy Dog and it’s a lot of fun! Mum taught me a long time ago that I can only control my own actions and I shouldn’t waste my energy trying to control others….. I often encounter Doggies who want to Bark mean things at me and I just take the higher ground and look the other way, I think it irritates them, but it sure makes me look good! Tee Hee

    Have fun buddy,

    Your pal Snoopy 🙂

  3. “…carrying around that baggage can’t be good for your posture.” I LOVE it! You are two wise and witty dogs!

    P.S. Duke asked me to howl “hi” to both of you. He’s such a flirt. Don’t worry girls, he’s all bark and no action..

  4. Let it go. Barking about it with her would only get you where she wants, useless, no need to. Write a letter and burn it and spit on it lol. Life will bite her tail sooner or later and if life doesn’t bite her she’ll get her tail will get caught in a door.

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